Friday, March 26, 2010

Revisiting Vivian’s Domain, Part 3

(Continuing archival republishing of excerpts from “Vivian’s Domain,” an FLR website originally hosted on In this installments “Vivian” includes letters from two grateful wives.)

Comment From Readers Who Have Tried DD:

‘Donna's Salute’

Dear Vivian,

I just had to write and tell you how much your advice has helped me and my marriage and to tell you about a wonderful way I came up with to be assured of my husband's best behavior when he is most at risk for acting disrespectfully or cranky.

First of all, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You for your advice last year and for helping me initiate Domestic Discipline with my husband. The improvement in our marriage is remarkable and I am happier than I've ever been. The wonderful change in my husband has been sustained now for over half a year and our marriage just gets sweeter every day. This is not to say that he does not fall short at times (and I have to admit that I've come to enjoy those little opportunities to correct him), but with the methods of discipline you've taught me and a little trick of my own I can always bring him back to full devotion. As you told me, he is happier than he's ever been also.

Here's the thing I wanted to tell you about, my own little creation. As we all know by now, a man is much more attentive to his wife when he's in a state of sexual arousal for her. In our written Domestic Discipline contract my husband agreed with the general principle that his sexuality rightfully belongs to me. I've also included in our contract a concrete symbol of this abstract principle.

Here's how it works. Bill (my husband) must present to me, upon my demand, an erection. We call it “Donna's Salute.” I can demand my salute at any time and if it takes him more than one minute to present one. I assume it is because he has masturbated since my last salute and he gets a severe spanking. I let at least a day go be between an authorized ejaculation and the next salute to be sure I'm being fair. I get my salute at least once a day and on some days quite a few times if necessary. It works well when he comes home from work. I demand my salute and he spends the rest of the evening doing as I ask him: setting the table, doing the dishes, spending time with the kids while I relax, etc.

The salute comes in most handy when we are with friends or family. There is a certain group of friends we've had since long before we were married and we enjoy their company often. Bill sometimes gets a little arrogant when we are with them, though, and is not always as respectful to me as he should be. I think it makes him feel like a big shot to take me for granted in front of his friends. When I start to see him acting in any way inconsiderate of me, I simply tell him I need to speak with him alone and demand my salute (this is always done in private in that I would never think of humiliating him in front of these friends). After he has given me my salute we rejoin the group and he is sweet and considerate of me again. It's like magic!

As a rule I make him go at least two weeks between orgasms so most of the time he is very able to provide the salute. When he is not able to provide my salute within a minute, it is still effective because he treats me wonderfully the rest of the day in order to mitigate the severity of the spanking he knows he is to receive in the near future.

Just thought I'd pass it on for what it might be worth to you and your readers. Thanks again for the happiness you have brought to my marriage.—Love, Donna

The Chart and the Weekly Review

Dear Vivian,

I wanted to write to tell you how much I appreciate the advice you've given me about Domestic Discipline and to let you know how the chart is working. Since I initiated DD with my husband about a year ago, our marriage has become better than it ever was (just as you said it would). Thank you for your advice and for giving me the courage to try.

One way I've found of keeping my husband on his best behavior at all times is to keep a chart of his behaviors in one of those diary type books with a lock on it. I let my husband know that I keep this chart but I never let him actually see it. He knows what I track in the chart and he knows that the chart will have a tremendous impact on him at his weekly review, but he has never seen it. The chart allows me to stop him in his tracks with just a look when he starts acting up or looks like he is about to neglect either me or something around the house that he is supposed to do. My look says, I'll make a note of this in the chart. That is often enough to turn his behavior around or even his attitude if he is about to lose his temper.

Sunday after church is our weekly review time. We drop the kids at their grandparents and have a couple hours of quality time to ourselves. It is a wonderfully relaxing time for me as Nick (my husband) carefully prepares brunch for me. He either serves me at table while I read the paper or on a TV tray if I want to watch TV. After brunch Nick cleans up and does the dishes while I relax and digest. Then I have him rub my feet or do my nails (I made him take a course in manicure so he could provide me this service at no expense to our family budget).

Finally I tell him to go upstairs and get my chart book and my hairbrush. He knows where the book is kept, but does not have access to the key. I keep the key with me at all times along with the key to his chastity belt when it is in use. When he has handed me the brush and the book, I tell him to remove his clothes and stand in the corner facing the wall. He is to keep absolute silence while I review his chart.

Actually, there is very little documentation in this book. I keep track of his last ejaculation and whether or not it was an authorized one and of his last spanking and how many swats I gave him. Any egregious offenses go in there such as losses of temper, disrespectful behavior or attitude toward me, drinking to intoxication, direct disobedience of a command, or failure to take care of his most basic household duties. The following is a list of all the things he thinks are documented in the chart:

Length of time since his last ejaculation
All of the household chores he has done during the week
All services he has provided me during the week—foot rubs, back massages, errands, dinners, etc.
All gifts and tokens of his love he has given me that week—flowers, cards, etc.
A daily breakdown of how pleasant or unpleasant he was around the house for each of the past six days
The number and quality of the orgasms he has given me over the past week
And any prohibited activities he h as engaged in over the past week

He doesn't know that only the first and last items along with date and severity of his last spanking are in the chart. As he stands facing the corner I unlock and open the book. I make knowing "hmmm" and "uhuh" noises as I thumb through the pages so he thinks I'm reviewing all the above data. My decisions about when I will authorize his next ejaculation and his punishment are based on a combination of the little data I do keep track of, my general principles, and the mood I'm in at the time.

He does know that my mood plays a role. That is why he's so attentive to making a nice brunch and assuring that the hour or so before the review is as pleasant as possible for me. That is why he is exceptionally sweet to me on Saturday nights. He knows that my feelings toward him are much more tender after he's given me a good orgasm or two.

(End of Part 3. Part 4 begins with one of the most insightful FLR writings I hav eever seen, Vivian’s “Toward A Fantastic Marriage.”)


AnxiousWaiting said...

My wife gives me blowjobs on demand.... that is the only time she would ever get my salute!! You women are out of your minds!!

Anonymous said...

My wife gets oral on demand. So to each his or her own. I am happy to server, honor and pleasure her. It is a privilege that she shares herself with me in this manor. I love to give her that pleasure and to know that she is the most important thing in my life.

runpb said...

In response to "Anxious Waiting":
You have an interesting screen name for a chap who gets it "on demand".
Your wife must be so happy that she is married to man who can, in less than three lines, reveal himself as an ordinary boring blowhard who disrespects her. I expect the mutual feelings of love, respect and adoration within your marriage are shallow at best. Don't feel bad, you're just normal. Not everybody can spend everyday being deliriously happy with their spouse. Here's an opportunity to get clue:
Very happy indeed is the woman whose man is secure enough in his masculinity to kneel before her, serve her and obey her.

Thanks to the webmaster. My wife and I are enjoying these posts very much.

Leslie said...


Before I met my boyfriend, I thought that most men were sort of like you. Interested in receiving "blowjobs on demand" but none too concerned with returning the favor. (Eh, I should probably preface that by mentioning that I'm only 24 and my experience is limited to the frat boys of my college years.)

I guess it goes without saying that my boyfriend proved me wrong. Actually, that's an understatement. After 2 years of tireless wooing (and a very ladies-first approach to sex), he has single handedly reshaped my entire view of men. In the best way possible. I may be "out of my mind" for preferring mutual satisfaction to "blowjobs on demand," but you know? It works for me.

Leslie said...

Oh, also - now that I've gone thoroughly off the original blog topic. Thanks for posting this series, Mark. While punishment is sort of beyond my personal realm of FLR practice, I enjoy learning about the experiences of other women.


When a husband and wife are in a WLM by mutual consent (as we are), punishment administered by the wife is the way the relationship really succeeds. Without it, it is only talk and half hearted effort. My wife takes the time to administer domestic discipline on me, and I am a much better husband for it.

First of all, the punishment is very unpleasant, as it should be. Our children are moved out now so it is easy for her to administer. Corner time is given out by her frequently, 2 hours a night for up to 14 nights while naked. Or tied up in her walk in closet to a hook in the ceiling for an Saturday afternoon while naked. (No tv sports). I am allowed to pee once, but only into a coffee can she puts my penis in and allows me relief.

She considers spanking and whipping a waste of her time, too much effort on her part. She feels she has to work too hard to do that. Instead, I am made to do alot of additional housework wearing only panties. We have a large amount of floor tiles downstairs and she has me on my hands and knees cleaning each one by hand. I will then be told to go into the large shower area and clean each wall tile and floor tile(those real small ones, we have 440 of them on the floor) using only new toothbrushes. It takes about 3 hours.

Twice she has brought me a a shopping mall at 10AM and told me to remain there all day. This is a new punishment she thought up. I was told that I must buy her 5 very nice items, each about 1 and 1/2 hours apart. She checks the receipts for the times. She calls often and asks to speak to a salesperson to see what store I am in. To make sure I don't leave she says she may be by at any time to pick me up. The last 2 times she called me was beween 6 and 7 PM and said she was outside the mall in the car and that I could leave now. What a awfully long boring day. When we got home she checked over my purchases for her. For each item I purchased for her, if she doesn't like it or it doesn't fit well, it is 2 hours a night for one week of corner time. The first time it was 4 items, that was one month of corner time. Last time it was 3 items, therefore 3 weeks. Plus no orgasms for me during that time.

We have a wonderful WLM. Most of all, I don't want to be punished by her because it shows that I have displeased her and made her unhappy with me. That bothers me the most. So I really improve and show her how good a very submissive husband can be. That makes her happy.

Mark Remond said...

Thanks Leslie and runpb. I was hoping someone would respond to AnxiousWaiting, in a good-natured, temperate manner. I think you will both enjoy the next installment of Vivian's Domain, if I can manage to free up an hour to post it. Oh, and WORSHIP HER, hang in there! Thanks, all.

Mark Remond said...

Oh, and thanks also to Anonymous, our "first responder."


Mark, It didn't seem worth the effort to respond to such an idiot as AnxiousWaiting. He shouldn't be on your site. A FLM is not for everyone, that's for sure. It works for guys like you and I and others who read and contribute to your great site. But some guys think they are too macho for that, or are too INSECURE to have the woman in their life take control, especially sexually. So they demand. Boy, he must be tons of fun at home, his poor wife having to live like that. I bet though that he does have a fantasy of being controlled by a woman, like his wife. He fulfills it by reading this site, and then says his ridiculous statement. So AnxiousWaiting (for what actually ?), my wife also puts me into a chastity device when she feels like it, and for weeks at a time, Would you allow your wife to do that? Try it, it's nice having your wife control and limit your orgasms.