Tuesday, August 3, 2010

A Short Course in Wife Worship by Au876

It was the pink-backdropped website of Real Women Don’t Do Housework that first unveiled for me the magical world of wife worship. And Fumika Misato, the creative genius behind RWDDH, was responsive to my early emails.

But it all remained an enticing dream until my first contact with a man actually living the wife-worship life on a day-to-day basis. That man, the mainstay and unofficial moderator of Misato’s original Husbands Forum, was known simply as Au876.

"Au" initiated topics and impromptu surveys, he posed provocative questions, he provided almost daily candid glimpses into his own wife-led world, and he responded to the frequent questions from the rest of us with unfailing enthusiasm and encouragement.

For several years he did all this, until he vanished into cyberspace. Without his considerable outreach, I believe wife worship would have remained pure fantasy for me, and for many others. Because of him, I knew it was real, and could be real for me, too. As it has become.

I have frequently quoted "Au," but it occurs to me that I might occasionally include some longer-form samples of his unique perspective on his chosen lifestyle.

I begin with an essay, nearly 1,000 words, that appeared more than a decade ago on a website that was called, as I recall, “Aunty Vera’s Females in Control.” It’s long gone, though perhaps retrievable on the Internet Archive Wayback Machine. I can’t verify at the moment, as I’m at work and those keywords are blocked!

Now sit back and enjoy a generous helping of Au876:

A Short Course in Wife Worship

A lot of men have written The Forum who are apparently in a vanilla relationship and are asking how they can get their wife to take control. I would like to address that issue.

First of all, if you as a man really want your wife in control, you have already taken the first long step. Where there is a will, there is a way.

Secondly, you must realize most women are not into the fetish part of female domination. It is unrealistic to expect your wife to start spanking you, to wear black leather boots and kick you in the butt if you don't obey her.

But most if not all women love to be pampered, adored, worshipped and listened to. Therefore if you want to taste the sweet fruit of submitting to your wife and having her in control, then pamper, adore, worship and listen to her.

Pamper her by taking over all the household chores. All of them! A Female In Control should never do any housework. Just tell her you have decided you should do all the housework and it is your goal to accomplish this within say three months.

She will probably have to teach you how to do things like the laundry, ironing, menu planning and cooking. But even a man can learn to clean a bathroom till it sparkles, vacuum, mop, dust, pick up messes, sweep, make beds, change sheets and a host of other mundane but necessary chores without supervision. Run her errands (now your errands) to save her the time and stress involved.

She may not believe you, so you will have to work hard to prove you are serious. You may be surprised how quickly she will let go and how eagerly she will teach you what you don't know.

Adore her by your actions and your words. Never miss a chance to tell her how beautiful she is, how smart she is and how much you cherish her. Rub her feet at night. Give her pedicures, fold her nightgown, clean her hair brush (daily), rub her back, tend her bath (for example a simple thing like bringing her a hot towel to dry off with is little trouble and yet very sweet).

When you are in public let your adoration spill over. Treat her like a lady at all times. Open doors for her, stand when she enters a room, don't interrupt her and be quick to tell everyone, anyone how special she is.

Worship her by treating her with the utmost respect, always putting her needs, wants and pleasures above your own and never expecting anything in return. The sheer joy of putting her first is your reward.

This is especially true in the bedroom. Sex should be when, where and how she says and strictly for her pleasure. Become an expert giving her oral sex and be willing to give it at anytime and anyplace. Never, never force yourself upon her or try to penetrate her. If she wants intercourse with you, she will let you know.

Listen to her. Her word is final. If in the past you have argued with her, failed to consult with her or not paid any attention to what she has said, then let the past become a distant memory. From this point forward your wife's word is the law. If she allows you input or seeks your opinion, then give it but otherwise you do as she says. Do it joyfully and with pride.

Don't question her decisions. If they prove to be wrong, never say anything. In fact you should take the blame.

In the few months you have taken to accomplish the above you should have noticed a huge change in your relationship. Your wife is more assertive, more decisive and more confident of your love.

You have probably heard her bragging on you to her friends and, believe me, she has, even if you haven't heard her.

If you haven't already done it, now is the time to turn over all financial control to your wife. Your paycheck should be direct-deposited into her personal checking account.

You may think your wife can't or does not want to handle the money. Odds are you are dead wrong. Once she has the control you will be amazed at her expertise and how this assumption of power will cement her control over you.

Three months after my wife took over she got “tired” of my having to ask her for money. She put me on an allowance. I thought it was way too little but she didn't. She did agree to review it every six months. It is a real taste of submission knowing she can and does spend the money as she sees fit without any input or questions from me while I have to subsist on a small allowance that she allows me.

The Female In Control lifestyle can be yours if you really want it. It may not be the way you want. It may not be sexually rewarding and your wife may not feed your fetishes.

You have to get over the idea it should do those things. Her being in control is exactly what it says it is. You submit to her will, you obey her, you work for and serve her and devote yourself to her with all your heart and soul.

The joy of submitting to her will far exceed your expectations. As she grows used to her new role, she will consolidate her power and probably set forth in some fashion guidelines and principles for you to adhere to. She may even devise ways to punish you. But no matter what she does, you comply, you obey and you take it like a man.
June, 2000


ep said...

I hope in 10 years time we aren't bemoaning the disappearance of Mark Redmond as you do Au876 today!

BT said...

Wonderful article, really says it all. A great how to guide to get that WLM going strong in many a marriage. Women love the idea of being pampered and worshipped much much more than the male fantasy of the wife with the short black leather skirt, topless, swinging a whip. (Does sound nice though). That is not going to happen after many years of a vanilla relationship. This is a great way to establish a firm and loving WLM, one almost any wife would enjoy.

As time goes on other ideas and items can be brought into the relationship, such as punishment for bad behavior on the husbands part. But that will take time.

Men, don't rush it. Try adding a little more after she is comfortable with what you do already. I know, I've been there 6years ago, and now we have a great WLM.

This blog is the best out there, we learn so much from it. I consider it to have helped us the most. Thanks!

BOB said...

I second what "ep " said. For a while i was wondering if Mark Redmond and Au876 were the same person

Obedient husband said...

I would expect that in time Mark will tire of the selfless service of maintaining a blog. Even if every one of his readers bought one his books, I seriously doubt if it is generating much of an income. My point is this: Those who give of themselves for the benefit of others with little or no thanks will eventually stop. My perspective is borne of personal experience. For years I gave of myself countless hours to the the local running club and running "community". What I learned is that people are more than happy to enjoy the fruits of your time, effort and work.... they actually grow to expect it.
After a few years, I made the conscious and deliberate decision to completely withdraw. Now, I keep to myself, I train hard, I sometimes show up to race. However, other than the obligatory entrance fees to run a race I contribute nothing voluntarily. Not any more.

I would suggest that if you enjoy Mark's work, then say thanks by buying one of his books.

Fortunately, the life of wife worship, while being one of service, does have its rewards :)

Obedient husband said...

I have posted previously as "runpb"

Allen said...

Financial problems are always the hardest and most controversial part of a marriage. My wife always paid the bills, but was afraid to take total control of the finance. She was against opening her own checking account and depositing my paycheck there; she believed we should both have access to the money. But she finally agreed. AU876 said:

"You may think your wife can't or does not want to handle the money. Odds are you are dead wrong. Once she has the control you will be amazed at her expertise and how this assumption of power will cement her control over you."

How right he was. Her whole personality changed when she took over all financial matters, and she is really good at it. This is the part that helped her enjoy her leadership in our marriage; even more then when I do all household chores.

Like him, I too receive an allowance that is way too small. If I need new clothes, she will take me shopping. Our daughters know who is in control. They always go to my wife if they need money for anything.

She used to discuss when she made purchases, and asked my input with expensive purchases. After taking total financial control, it took a while for her to get used to it, but now buys anything she wants, within HER budget, and on MY paycheck, without any input or knowledge on my part. We (she) will be needing a new car in the near future, and I know I will not know what till she has it in the driveway.

Men, don't be afraid to turn over all your financial matters to your wife. Wives, you may be uncomfortable with it at first, take that control. Putting his paycheck in your account may seem very wrong, but you may find it is the only way for your financial stability. And put him on a short leash. Financial problems no longer exist in our home. She may make mistakes with the money at times, and often I dislike my inability to spend what she gives. But my wife is in control, and that the only thing that matters.

Mark Remond said...

Really, some excellent comments, which I could not respond to until now, returning from a brief family vacation in the Southwest -- seeing some of our spectacular national parks along with the August-vacationing Europeans.
First, I want to thank Obedient Husband, formerly runpb, for the complimentary words (and the exhortation to buy the books). I know there have been lags here, but my interest is unflagging. I often am impelled to post here when I should be doing writing that is, at least potentially, much more remunerative. In fact, I am about to plunge back into an unfinished thriller novel, which may make posting even more problematical. But I don't intend to go away. If anything, I am even more hopelessly enthralled by the lifestyle and all the feelings that accompany it.
I also want to thank BT for his amen to Au876's advice, and BOB, too.
Finally I want to mention to Allen that his account of turning over finances to his wife parallels my own experience exactly, and Au's. In fact, I think my next posting may be a multi-parter, mostly excerpting Au876, on that very topic, with my own comments interpolated.

Weave said...

As I'm heading this way with Wife, I appreciate your words...thank you!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this post, it is wonderful. I agree that financial control for the wife is the most important part of the marriage and solidifies her (my) control. This was hard for me to manage at first, but now I would not have it any other way.

My husband's paycheck goes directly into my account. His pay is used to pay the bills, and it is his job to manage the finances; so he is able to pay the bills but does not have access to any to spend. My paycheck goes into another account he cannot see, and I use that to spend on whatever I want, but most goes into my savings.

Mark Remond said...

Thank you, Anonymous, for adding your strong comments on the benefits of the wife taking full financial control in a wife-led marriage. I hope to post additional thoughts on this subject by Au876 in the next day or two.

Anonymous said...

I absolutely agree with all of this and kneel and worship my Fiance who I will marry. I put Her first above all even god. She is my religion and deserves worship.

Anonymous said...

More instructions to worship a woman:


But my view is: Worship wife as earthly goddess? Yes. But the woman also must worship her husband.

Anonymous said...

Thanks Mark, I am on the ground floor of the FLR -- I desire so much and have so much to give my wife of 1 years. I work hard and have alot of people that rely on me at work. I so much desire to come home and BE CONTROLLED -- I am willing to be there at her beckon call. I do most of the chores, she has complete control of the money. It hurts that she just seem disinterested and seems to forget about what I want to become in her life -- I want to be 110% under her control - I love this article which says do what you can Love her and she has the right to respond or not -- thanks drumr

Anonymous said...

Thanks Mark, I am on the ground floor of the FLR -- I6 desire so much and have so much to give my wife of 1 years. I work hard and have alot of people that rely on me at work. I so much desire to come home and BE CONTROLLED -- I am willing to be there at her beckon call. I do most of the chores, she has complete control of the money. It hurts that she just seem disinterested and seems to forget about what I want to become in her life -- I want to be 110% under her control - I love this article which says do what you can Love her and she has the right to respond or not -- thanks drumr

Mark Remond said...

Anonymous, thank you for sharing and baring your submissive-to-wife feelings. Good luck! We're all in this together...

Anonymous said...

Taking financial control firmly cements a woman's control over her husband. Until then, everything could be construed as mere roleplaying and fantasy...but once a husband signs over control of his bank account and direct deposit, he has stepped from fantasy into reality. He can't take it back, and she won't want to give it back. She has absolute power. A woman who controls a man financially also controls a man sexually. He truly MUST strive to please her in bed, because his livelihood depends upon her. If a woman has financial control over her husband, and she'd like him to add some bulk and regain his washboard abs, she can simply drop a subtle cue...and he'll KNOW he needs to hit the gym hard...because if she controls his finances, she has the leverage to demand anything from him physically and/or sexually. He'll spent 10 hours/week in the gym until her eyes bulge when she takes off his shirt and she sighs with pleasure while raking her fingernails along the ridges of his abs. Then he'll know that she's pleased. In this way, a woman can use financial control to secure the hot male body and passionate sex she craves.

Tony Conrad said...

Mmm. Some things attract me but being a christian I believe the wife should submit to the husband and the husband to Christ. I don't dominate her though. Just love her and I confess I get her to use the paddle on me for sexual reasons.

Anonymous said...

Tony Conrad:
"I believe the wife should submit to the husband."

Yes, quite rightly, but if husband wants - "wife rule" (FLR or femdom). It is also only the will of her husband. This is also only subordinate to his will. Husband decided for this, she should submit and implement this in life. ;-)

Tony Conrad said...

The verses in the scripture about submitting to your husband are only addressed to wives. Therefore she is not obeying the scripture if she is dominating him. If a husband wants his wife to dominate him (apart from bedroom play) then he is going against the pattern of scripture as he should submit to Christ who is the head of the husband and the husband is the head of the wife.

Anonymous said...

Tony Conrad, okay.

I'm a Christian-Catholic, for Catholics this words of the Bible are only a recommendation, not commandments. ;-) (Most - majority words in the Bible is only a recommendation for Christians.)

Exists christian freedom:

"It has been decided by the Holy Spirit and by ourselves not to impose on you any burden beyond these essentials..."
(Acts of Apostles 15, 28)

"'For me everything is permissible'; maybe, but not everything does good."
(1Corinthians 6, 12)

For me everything is permissible. :-)

Tony Conrad said...

So you set aside an exhortation in scripture and replace it with what you think?

You don't leave any basis to discuss on but what you think as opposed to what scripture says.

Anonymous said...

Tony Conrad, yes. :-) Every Christian is free. And I repeat: This words of the Bible (wives to subordinate to husbands) are only a recommendation, not commandments. And biblical recommendation are ideal for most people, not for all people. Every man is different and unique. God knows it. Therefore Bible says:

"It has been decided by the Holy Spirit and by ourselves not to impose on you any burden beyond these essentials..." (Acts of Apostles 15, 28)

or: "For me everything is permissible..." (1Corinthians 6, 12)

You do not respect this?

GOD's gift for Christians is - Freedom.

Only this is very important and top commandment - Jesus says:

"I give you a new commandment: love one another; you must love one another..." (John 13,34)

- Yes, this is commandment, top commandment, this is New Testament.

(I'm not a subordinate to my wife, I'm only worship my wife. But I respect lifestyle as FLR. Every man is different. And every man is free.)


Tony Conrad said...

If you set aside scripture so easily I cannot comment. You will have to live with your own decisions.

Anonymous said...

Scripture gives freedom

Tony Conrad said...

The truth will only set you free if you believe and act on it. All the word of God is truth. Quite clearly you are only picking what you want and rejecting the rest. You may fool yourself but you cannot fool God in the long run.

Anonymous said...

Very right. You may fool yourself.

Any discussion is meaningless.