Thursday, November 21, 2013


PARIS—As noted in my previous posting, “I take discipline very seriously in my house, and I think it really helps cement our amorous relationship." And, as promised at the end of that posting, I will here discuss some consequences for severe infractions.

This might be too graphic, but it does give an idea of strict consequences

Of all the consequences for infractions, I think penetration is for him hands down the most humiliating experience. The first time it was done, it was a consequence of his resisting my authority. I had my arms around him while he was doing the dishes, touching his butt, which I do regularly (see below), and he resisted. I wanted to start making love, but he was having a tantrum and said he did not want to. So I made a decision. I wound my hands around his waist and continued to feel him and told him to look straight ahead.
Unfortunately I had to tell him several times and finally I lost my patience. I unzipped his trousers and whispered into his ear, “Get down on your hands and knees.” He started trembling, looking at me and asking, “Why?”

I repeated the command, pointing my finger down at the floor. I kept it down until he knelt down and obeyed. Then I went into my room and got the dildo. I think he expected a spanking. He always grits his teeth beforehand—he HATES to be punished—and returned with it. I pulled down the boxers and that’s when it started.

I hope I am not being too coarse or direct here, but the butt/bottom/posterior is the best place, I think, to humiliate a man. It’s the one spot they never have “invaded.” I don’t know how to say this delicately, but a strap-on should be used as a stern and straightforward punishment. The first time I did this, he cried. Make sure you dominate your little boy completely. I stayed in him a long time and gave him a little kiss, asking him, “Who’s in charge?” while still in him. He could barely get out an answer. “And what’s your job?” I asked next.

“To obey.”


“To obey you.”

“That’s a good boy.”

I patted him and eventually let him get dressed.

This is reserved for serious punishments. For days afterward he didn’t look me in the eye. He was miserable for a long time, but it definitely changed his attitude. I administered these punishments in our teens, and I kept them when we took up dating again. They are just as potent now as they were then.

His Butt

Okay, now I have to admit this is one of my favorite things about our relationship. The posterior/ass/bottom/butt is almost a sacred thing for men; and, of course, because being penetrated is something that rarely happens, unless certain circumstances arise. I am not sure this site is the place for such details, but penetration is a must for the dominant female if she is going to completely put her household in order. For those starting out, however, butt swatting is a good place to start asserting your authority over your man.

I swat my boyfriend’s butt, and it has changed our relationship. Take control of that. Touch it, feel it, grope it, pat it, rub it, know it inside and out, every curve, the whole shape. Make it a habit. Touch it constantly. I sometimes rub it when he is doing the dishes, or scrubbing the floor, or vacuuming. In other words, all the time, just to feel it, and know that it’s all mine.

I DO swat it when I think he’s being sulky, when he’s moping, or just plain being annoying. A good, hard smack on the bottom is just what he needs to get him in line. He doesn’t often have cross words, but when he has a something disrespectful to say, swat that butt! I don’t know about yours, but my man is VERY sensitive to it. He HATES it when I touch his bottom, he feels this mixture of humiliation and gratitude for me touching him.

Pat it lovingly when having sex, or when you admire him or want him to do something. In my house, there is one place he belongs—the kitchen. If he’s not in it, there’s something wrong. So nudge him toward it, and let him know his place.


Obedient husband said...

Helene is a rare woman indeed!
It is extreme, but part of me is a bit envious of Helene's boy.
Of course, after the last posting, I can't help but wonder about the limits.
Does Helene feel any obligation to keep the relationship monogamous?
I've always found this whole notion of cuckolding to be "too far", but I've never thought much about it.
My wife enjoys our WLM, but she also sets limits as to how far we go with it.
She worries that increasingly deviant behavior leads to increasingly deviant behavior.
While she likes "wearing the pants" in the family, she is also quite uncomfortable with the idea of humiliating me.
She is fearful of digressing to a point at which she has no respect for her husband.

I think she is a wise woman.

Anonymous said...

Loved the Helene message. Her strength of will and self-confidence are very attractive. They are also, it seems to me, necessary for a wife-led relationship because the male ego is so strong. As she points out, males need structure. It’s one thing for a male to talk to his wife about reservations he may have about this or that, but quite another to flagrantly resist her authority in the household.

To my mind, what Helene did was not extreme. When a male head of household used to exert ownership of his wife’s body in this manner, no one objected. But, today when a strong woman does it to her partner, we hear moral outrage. We hear that just because men it in the past, doesn’t make it right. Maybe so, but males in general haven’t yet assimilated a supportive, self-sacrificing, submissive personality. Once that happens, the old male ego will be gone and women will be able to exercise their family authority without all the resistance. At some point, a househusband will interpret a swipe on his butt not as something humiliating but as a sign of love and reassuring wifely authority. Perhaps that is already the case these days with Helene’s boy.


Anonymous said...

Obedient Husband, I feel like that last post was very powerful for you. My boy does really well with humiliation, it changes his behaviour instantly. He's the emotional type. But your wife sounds kind and generous to you.
LG, I agree. I think that men get easily confused by complex situations, and a woman should explain to her man why such rules are the way they are, and execute them promptly. My boy can tell how dearly I hold the issue by my reaction. If he does not want the punishment, well, he should do what he's told. As for the butt smacking, he has never gotten used to it. He gives me this little look, partly one of "hey", which just tells me he needs a trip to the bedroom - or just finish his chore, and stop thinking about it. It was one of our agreements that he is here for my pleasure.

Obedient husband said...

I've been home all day today, much of the time alone as my wife was working. I'm in school, so my time was divided between schoolwork and some housekeeping chores my wife told me to get done.
Anyway, I've been mulling this over and I've decided that Helene pretty much rocks!
I think women in FLR's have a lot of leeway to pretty much run things how they want.
Our marriage is "tame" in comparison to Helene's and in some ways I'd like to see it become more like Helene's. However, because my wife is indeed the navigator, she decides where we go and the speed at which we make the journey.
She will for certain steer clear of adultery. Even if I asked her to consider it for the sake of some of some fantasy…… she wouldn't go there.
I simply couldn't handle that anyway.

She does occasionally swat my butt, but I rather like the attention.
Helene's writing generally resonates with me.
Thank you ma'am for taking the time.

Anonymous said...

Definitely, Helene rocks. On this blog she takes her place with Beckie Sue and Nancy as exemplars of women in female-led relationships. I have been in several female led relationships, but none at present. I can say that it is very difficult to develop a submissive, service-oriented personality without close supervision by a strong woman. Helene says that men’s “number one right is to firm, consistent and effective boundaries. Men have a hard time with self-control. It helps them feel secure to know the female in whose care they are can lovingly take on this responsibility, and it is essential that he feel protection from his own innate foolishness.” This so true.


Anonymous said...

"penetration butt"

- I'm a worshiper of women, but this is the top of disgust for me. I'm not gay.

Anonymous said...

"He started trembling, looking at me and asking, “Why?”

I read this as the worst of his infractinos. Up till then, he was just being resistant to your sexual advances, which could be just a result his him being moody (a reason, not an excuse).

But questioning "Why?" shows a sign of second guessing your directive. It is as though you had to provide sufficient justification to convince him to accept the order.

While physical punishment isn't as large a part of our relationship as the one you describe, I know my punishment would be a lot more severe if I were to question or second-guess her instructions.

Allen said...

Helene Rocks! But my wife strongly disagrees with her. My wife doesn't believe I Belonged chained to the kitchen. I am allowed into the living room to vaccume, the bathroom to scrub the floor and shower, the basement to do laundry etc.