Friday, August 8, 2008

Isn’t She Simply Divine? - Part One

As I said in my book (Chapter 5, Page 48): “Worshipping Your Wife is not about literal worship (goddess or otherwise), idolatry or anything even remotely sacrilegious. It is about respecting and honoring, revering and protecting, adoring and cherishing.”

I went on to belabor the obvious point: “We’re speaking poetically—the hyperbolic language of lovestruck suitors. It is through this rose-colored prism we view the creatures we love. ‘All women are goddesses,’ screen goddess Nicole Kidman decreed… Boyfriends need to understand that if women are worshiped, the world will be a better place.’”

Issue settled? You might think so, but you’d be wrong. Some newcomers attracted to the wonderful world of Female-Led Relationships are ready to do a one-eighty when they encounter the “Worship” word.

Like this guy: "As much as I love my bride, I cannot, will not, put her in the place of God in my life, and as such can't consider ‘wife worship.’ The Bible says that we are to worship God alone (Revelations 19:10 and 22:9). And if I attempt to put anybody or anything in God's place, my life falls apart.”

I certainly don’t intend to offend anyone’s faith, or launch a debate on Biblical exegesis and theology. I thought I was dealing in romantic metaphor, the “hyperbolic language of love,” using “worship” figuratively, as a daily and reverential attitude that combines love and devotion, honoring and cherishing.

But maybe that’s not clear enough. So I’ve dredged up a few responses to this objection.

Here’s one from Fumika Misato’s original Wife Worship Yahoo Forum (back in 1999) from a poster screen-named “pbear”: "[My wife] suggested that wife worship was sacreligious and it made her uncomfortable. I worship God and thank God for bringing my wife into my life and pray that I am given the strength to stay focused on her and the role she plays in my life.”

Lady Misato offered her own clarification: “I don't think that anyone's use of the term ‘worship,’ including myself, means anything of a religious level. And I'm not sure how serious even the most serious female-supremacists are about the religious content. At best, they are more spiritually oriented.”

“I agree with Lady Misato,” amened Au876. “We are talking about submitting to our wife, putting her needs and wants above our on… We are not praying to her and while we may be seeking her guidance, we don't think it is divine.”

Or, as I wrote in an earlier blog-post: “We intend no sacrilege; I think we just get carried away.”

But this does not close the case. Some worshipful husbands, and worshipped wives, do use the “W” verb non-poetically, it seems. “My wife has started referring to herself as goddess,” writes a devout husband, “and I’ve tried to treat her like one, even to the point of worship. She has no problem whatsoever with my ‘idolatry.’”

Years ago a young man sought Elise Sutton’s advice when his girlfriend made the same demand: “My girlfriend wants me to literally worship her as a Superior Being, a Goddess if you will, in both physical and psychological aspects. However, I am having trouble with this request. Wouldn't I be guilty of idolatry in the physical act of worshipping my Mistress? My girlfriend is a staunch believer in female supremacy and says that it is okay for me to worship God's most perfect creatures on earth."

Elise’s response resonates with Lady Misato’s: “Your girlfriend is challenging you to explore the spiritual aspects of the female domination lifestyle. I am sure she does not feel she is a deity. It sounds like she wants you to recognize her superiority over you and she is demanding that you worship her as your earthly Goddess.”

But Ms. Sutton is only getting started on this provocative topic: “It is a beautiful thing when a man humbles himself before a woman and worships her as his earthly Goddess. Humility is an important aspect of Christianity. Jesus humbled himself before his disciples as he washed their feet during the last supper. Was he committing idolatry? No, he was serving them and teaching them how to serve one another… When you bow before your superior Goddess, you are recognizing her supreme position over you. You are not exalting her above God. If you did that, then you would be committing idolatry. But if you exalt her as your earthly Queen and Goddess, you should be able to rectify that with your conscience.”

Then Ms. Sutton goes a step farther on the issue of idolatry. There are female supremacists who encourage, and even demand what she believes is idolatrous worship from their men:
“I know some women who actually make their submissive men pray to them. They make them perform rituals as they worship their earthly Goddess. I have never embraced that sort of female domination due to my conscience…”

I was aware of that, of course, when I wrote the book, but chose not to delve too deeply into such practices. But perhaps I will in another post, Part 2 of “Isn’t She Simply Divine?”


Anonymous said...

First, regular reading, and big fan of this blog, I wanted to say that.
Interesting topic to be sure!

Poignant in my own life, to be certain. I HAVE put my Wife in a "devine position" in my life, and I recognize that comepletely. (She doesn't necessarily care how I rationalize it to myself, as long as I obey.)

I'm not a believer in any kind of Celestial Diety, and as long as I have Her, I don't feel the need for one. I am fully aware that she's not "a goddess" in the "Omnipotent Creator" sense, but I diefy her her in the following ways:
1. I assume she can see my soul, therefore she would know instantly if I were to lie or in any way be untrue to her.
2. "Blind Faith," I take her word as Gospel. I unquestioningly do as she says, and accept what she tells me as Truth. Like many religious poeople, I take her word over "facts" or doubt.
3. Because she is a superior being, Rules don't apply to Her, at least not as far as we are concerned. She can do no wrong, and and has "Divine Infallibility."
4. I do, at times, formally Worship her. I don't pray as in asking for things, it usually will consist of her sitting or laying down why I kneel and spout Devotions to Her.

I don't don't recommend giving such Faith in just anyone, it has taken YEARS to build that kind of trust to put such devotion in a human being. She doesn't insist I do any of this, I consider it an honor that she allows me to. I also don't expect her to be "perfect" or above the human experience. Sometimes I show my devotion by freely giving her a shoulder to cry on...

I feel that many people in search of God are really searching for Unconditional Love, Forgiveness and Acceptance. These are all things I find with Her.

Also I don't expect her to be "perfect" or above the human experience. Sometimes I show my devotion by freely giving her a shoulder to cry on, or offering advice. Whatever She needs of me.

Anonymous said...

Apologies, I should have edited before posting.

Mark Remond said...

anonymous, don't worry about typos, your heartfelt eloquence comes through perfectly. And I appreciate your candor. What you say resonates with me, because I have had a lifelong problem with worship... though I am a believer. But all my worshipful emotions are instantly accessible when I view God's greatest creation... and I am happy that my wife has now assumed that exalted place in my life. I am coming to grips with this, or trying to, in these postings. Or, as you say, trying to "rationalize" it. Thanks for the contribution.