Friday, August 22, 2014


(This is the first of what I hope will be a series of posts from a young couple recently embarked on a wife led marriage. Since Brad sent me his “story” first, I’ll start with that, and follow in a few days with Shannon’s version of how they came together, and how she took control.—Mark Remond)

Brad: I grew up in a family were my mother was clearly in charge. She is the one who told us what to do and disciplined us when we disobeyed. She told dad what to do as well. My family consists of my mom, my dad, my older sister and older brother and myself. If mom and dad weren’t around, my sister was in charge. I thus grew up accepting that the women had more authority in the home than men.

I dated my wife, Shannon, in high school and often let her be in charge, but I got teased by the other guys a lot and I ruined it by arguing with her a lot, trying to be “the man.” I didn’t know it at the time, but there are different types of men, and I am a submissive one. I like others to be in charge, I feel safe and secure that way. It took me living on my own with no one to guide me to realize this.

By the time I graduated college I knew I needed someone that would take control of our relationship, and I vowed this time I would not screw it up. I got lucky when my high school girlfriend came to my party and saw that I was not trying to be the dominant one anymore. She seemed interested in me for some reason, but I was scared. Over the summer we hung out again and finally we got back together, but she made it clear it was not to be like last time. Jokingly I told her that she might have to spank me if I did that so I would learn. She laughed and I thought everything would be fine until I got very grouchy at some point and snapped at her for no reason other than I was stressed. That was when our relationship changed.

Prior to this my wife called the shots, made decisions and reminded me of what I needed to do, but this behavior of mine made her realize she would not put up with me snapping. She yelled at me and gave me a choice—either I could leave, or she would do exactly as I had suggested when we got back together, i.e., punish me in order to teach me what was and was not acceptable behavior.

I was shocked, but happier with Shannon at that moment than I had ever been, and so agreed to let her punish me. But when she told me to drop my pants and briefs and bend over her lap, I was humiliated. That first spanking was more humiliating then painful since she only used her hand, but I still cried, mostly I think from the guilt. I behaved really well after that—for a while, but it came to the point where I snapped at her again, and so got another spanking. This one was harder than the first.

This cycle continued for a while until Shannon began to punish me for other things that annoyed her (and still do). Now I know that I can always count on her to help me be a good husband for her, and a good father to my kids in the future. (Fortunately, I have a few years to learn from Shannon’s instruction before that happens!)

I should mention that, outside our home, people see a relatively normal couple where both people work. They see me treat my wife with respect and vice versa. The system of our wife led marriage will evolve, I am sure, but it works well for us, and I love her today even more than I did when we got engaged.


Anonymous said...

I enjoyed reading this. I'm servant but not submissive, and having been warned by my mother-in-law to keep at least partial control of the finances, I appreciate the moderate point of view here. It's very refreshing. I do have a bit of a temper, maybe I should let my wife find this post.


Kathy said...

The picture on top tells the story. He kneels, gently kisses her leg while she touches him on the back of his neck.
This is a pose that should be recreated every day of their married life together.


salboi said...

I had a friend of my wife's come to me and say how much she admired watching us and the love-respect I show. I wanted to explain everything about our relationship and my better half did allow that one day with a friend she had who got really interested in it, then tried to make a move for me to be that to her. She's been married about six times so hub stealing is her hobby. Well she failed. But it's something I wish was out there more. It's neat watching the envy from some women who either were married to self-focused hubs or are still married to one.

Anonymous said...

Great story Brad.

I am an older submissive husband and maybe I can help with advice.

I am known formally as Mr Clare Doncaster. My maiden name was Jim Stynes.

Jim Doncaster

Mark Remond said...

Mr. Clare, nice to see you posting here again. You must lead a blessed life serving Ms. Clare. I hope Brad responds to your comment.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Mark

Oh, i got such a thrill when you called me Mr Clare.

Thanks so much.

Yes, i am still very happy "in service".

i love to answer questions and share our lifestyle.

Mr Clare Doncaster (was Jim Stynes)

Anonymous said...

Mark said, "Since Brad sent me his “story” first, I’ll start with that, and follow in a few days with Shannon’s..."

Unless it's to serve a literary purpose, why are you putting his before hers?

Anonymous said...

Yes, i wondered about that too. But he put Shannon's name first. Which is good. As HOH, she should speak first i think. It is always Ms and Mr Clare here.

Mark Remond said...

Literary purpose, I think. That was my judgment.

Anonymous said...

Sorry about the funny look of my last comment. i posted it from my mobile phone.

Literary purpose is OK. But normally a woman should speak first. And the man second, and only with permission.

Everything i post here is with Clare's express permission.

Mr Clare Doncaster

Anonymous said...

Incidentally, i am now legally Mr Clare Doncaster. I had my name changed by Deed Poll.

Some of my family and friends were a bit upset, but I am old enough now that it doesn't matter. And i rather hope people snicker at me behind my back. i did it for my Wife and She is amused and pleased, which is what really matters.

Mr Clare

Mark Remond said...

Brad responds to Mr. Clare:

I am interested in learning about your relationship, my wife and I are just starting out, and other than her disciplining me, we live a standard life, we both work, though I am also in school, we share the chores around the house and we both pay the bills, the only thing out of the ordinary is I get my butt spanked and corner time if I mess up.


Anonymous said...

Mr Shannon


i am very happy to tell you more, and answer follow-up questions, if you like. But i have to clear things through Clare. i assume i have Ms Shannon's permission to speak to you directly?

i won't share too much now, more later i suppose, but i can tell you that i am retired, my wife is still working, She is the chief breadwinner now. i am in submission to Her. Symbolically, i had my last name changed to Hers fairly recently. So i am now Mr Clare Doncaster (maiden name Jim Stynes).

Of course my friends still call me Jim but they and my family have had to get used to my being Jim Doncaster now. i am retired, like i said, so there is no problem with work colleagues.

My wife sits at the head of the table, i wait on her. Sex is on Her terms of course.

If you want to know more, please ask me, but i do need reassurance that it is OK with your wife for me to talk to you directly like this.

Oh, and i do the laundry and grocery shopping. i feel a bit strange lining up with all the other housewives, so to speak, at the checkout. But that is my life now!

Mr Clare

Mark Remond said...

Brad responds again to Mr. Clare:

My wife is the HOH, and she does discipline me as needed, but I am actually the main "breadwinner" as I work 2 jobs while going to school. Shannon also works, but my field pays better. I do not know if we will ever reach the point you talk about, but to be honest I hope we don't. I like making her happy, but I also like my job and everything as it is now.