Tuesday, November 4, 2014
POSTSCRIPT: KAITLIN’S FLR RESEARCH
From Mark Remond: I must apologize to readers of this blog. In the final paragraph of the preceding post (from dennis), I misinterpreted dennis’ email to me on reader contributions to Kaitlin’s ongoing research on FLRs. She is not looking to post an FLR questionnaire on this site. What She is trying to do, dennis explains, is broaden the number of Women and couples from whom she can get information, to see if the trends She’s seeing so far hold up.
More specifically, Kaitlin is looking for Women and couples who are willing to share information about their relationship and experiences, particularly as regards the authority and latitude the Woman have exercised over the course of the marriage. She’s looking for Women first, and then, ideally, Husbands who can speak to their relationship with a strong Woman. And because Kaitlin is interested in historical trends, She is interested in information from strong Women who had to exert that strength in an era of strict gender roles featuring stereotypically weak Females.
Kaitlin is also interested to learn how men married to strong and assertive Women during these decades coped? Yes, there were many such husbands, according to Kaitlin’s research thus far, husbands who were seeing other men on TV who fit the macho mold while they were obediently putting on aprons and taking instructions from their Wives on domestic duties. Why were so many men absolutely thrilled with this arrangement when it defied patriarchal conventions?
According to Kaitlin the best male interviews are from:
§ Men who describe surrendering their patriarchal authority to a Woman as soon as they walked in the door
§ Men who feared their Wives; many fearing Her temper, let alone Her discipline
§ Men who shopped with their Wives – a no-no back in the “Father Knows Best” era – dutifully standing by as She tried on and subsequently bought outfits and then carrying Her bags as She shopped store-to-store
§ Men accommodating their Wives’ social activities by staying at home and tending to household chores
§ Men who wouldn’t dare come home at least once a week without flowers or candy for a demanding lady
§ Strong businessmen who dutifully surrendered their pay to their Wife, recognizing Her authority and never questioning Her
§ Men who played the powerful man role at a party with his Wife on his arm, only to surrender to Her in the car
Readers who meet Kaitlin’s suggested criteria, and who are willing to provide information along these lines, are invited to write to me — firstname.lastname@example.org – and I will forward your emails on to dennis, and ultimately to Kaitlin. Please note the following from dennis, however: “While Kaitlin would love inputs from a few select men, Her real interest is seeking Women's inputs around such experiences.”