Wednesday, February 5, 2014
DENNIS: VOWS OF OBEDIENCE & FIDELITY IN A ROLE-REVERSAL MARRIAGE
(A note from Mark Remond: There have been several comments critical of one of the Protocols mentioned in Dennis' earlier posting on that topic. That Protocol reads: “the man takes vows of obedience and fidelity; She does not!” Commenter Greg writes: “In this household, the women have partners other than their husbands? But the husbands remain faithful? I was under the impression that most women prefer monogamy so this part actually goes against what I believed most women want.” And Ronald comments: “I am kind of confused. People keep talking about women in femdom relationships being allowed to date other men. Why is that a sign of an ‘advanced’ FLR? Regardless of who is in charge shouldn't both partners be faithful to one another? Isn’t that the very definition of a relationship? Mutually exclusive love? If anything these relationships where the women are allowed to date other men should be called extreme relationships not advanced ones.” Taking the opposing view, Anonymous commented: “I too promised to love, honor and obey my Wife. She only promised to love me. While She has not dated other men, I know it is Her right to do if She wishes. While that might hurt me at first, my only concern is Her happiness. She is free to do as She pleases with no regard to my wishes. I belong to Her, not Her to me.” With that preamble in mind, here is Dennis’ clarification of his position, which is obviously in complete sync with the letter and spirit of The Protocols.)
Wedding vows for a couple entering into or already in a Female-led marriage are specifically structured to support a role reversal over patriarchal norms. Her not taking a vow of fidelity can simply be very symbolic of Her authority and his acceptance of it, or it can empower Her to do as She pleases. It's funny how men as a group have tacitly or openly embraced infidelity for centuries, but when Women do the same, men get all concerned.
In a Female-led lifestyle a man fully accepts Her authority to to whatever She pleases. He also accepts any limits She places on him. It's not a cafeteria plan where he picks and chooses what She can and cannot do; it's Her choice and Hers alone, PERIOD! We know of situations where Wives have elected to “pursue other options,” most often quietly, but sometimes quite openly. Nancy's Aunt was quite open about Her boyfriends. Carol, my boss, also has boyfriends, but quietly; it's Her prerogative and i don't say a word to Her husband whom i know well. On the other hand, were i to find out that Carol's husband was guilty of an infidelity, i'd tell Carol as i have other Women in the past when their man's behavior was out of bounds.
i'm not advocating infidelity, simply accepting one of the tenets of a Female-led relationship, that being, it's always Her choice