dennis: GIFT SUGGESTIONS FOR THE DOMESTICATED MAN

With the holidays rapidly approaching, one may wonder what to get the domesticated man – assuming, of course, that the Woman in his life deems him deserving! There are many suggestions depending on your budget, relationship to the recipient, and the preferences of the Woman in his life. We’d suggest gifts that are practical in terms of helping him in his domestic routine. The right gift makes a statement about his role in the relationship, so consider carefully. Better still, a man should ask his Wife to contact the recipient’s Wife for suggestions as to what She feels is appropriate. Gifts don’t have to be expensive to be appreciated. Often it’s an inexpensive one that is most appreciated or is the most meaningful. So here are some suggestions:

Vacuum Cleaner – Nothing says “domestic service” like a new vacuum, and i can attest to the fact that a vacuum is really appreciated. Nancy’s Aunt bought me a high-end vacuum, and i think of Her every time i use it, which is daily. The Women had me open it and try it out as soon as i unwrapped it. If your man already has a serviceable vacuum, consider a smaller, portable vac. These come with attachments that allow cleaning hard-to-reach places like heating ducts and vents and in tight spots behind furniture; they are surprisingly inexpensive. A portable vac can take his cleaning to new heights (and depths). i received one and use it often, always taking it when i clean outside our home. Giving a vacuum recognizes that he does the housekeeping and that She’s in charge!

 

Iron – This had to be at or near the top of the list as a gift for the domesticated man since ironing is a part of our domestic routine. A high-end, feature-laden iron might cost nearly $150 but is well worth it in terms of the quality and speed of his ironing. There are less-expensive irons that have impressive features and don’t cost a lot of money; check online. he likely has an iron but will always appreciate another; i have three irons and routinely use all of them. Again, giving him and iron shows you acknowledge She’s in charge.

Clothing Steamer – A portable, full-size steamer will allow him to better care for your suits, dresses, and skirts, all for around $125. i’ve worked a steamer into my repertoire, steaming Her business suits before returning them to the closet; they’re fresh, wrinkle-free, and ready to go when She next needs them.

Aprons – This, too, had to be near the top; an apron is an essential part of a progressive gentleman’s attire . i have a number of them, many received as gifts. Wearing one reinforces a man’s role in the relationship. Aprons range from very fancy to purely practical novelty aprons, the ones, for example, that say, “She’s the boss i only work here.” When he unwraps it, have him put it on although he’s likely to want to do that without prompting. And don’t worry about him having too many aprons; there’s no such thing! Can a Woman have too many pairs of shoes? Of course not! Well a domesticated gentlemen can’t have too many aprons! An apron can be had for as little as $25 but can cost significantly more depending on the material and decoration.

Serving Tray – We’re talking a nice pewter one here or something similar. In our home a tray is mandatory when serving the Women; everything is served from and removed to a tray. It’s a nice formality and one that the superior gender deserves! If he already has a tray, inquire as to the size and style and get him something different.

Cookbook – If he cooks – or you want him to learn – then a cookbook is a great gift; if it’s for your man you might consider going through it first with bookmarks to highlight recipes that interest you.

Needle Crafts – Knitting, crochet, and cross stitch are frequently associated with Women but enlightened gentlemen are crossing gender lines to eagerly take up these crafts. Take a knitting class and i guarantee there will be male students. i find needle crafts to be relaxing and enjoyable. i enjoy participating in Sue’s knitting group and have participated in community knitting projects such as making and donating knitted scarves. You can assemble a nice gift from a local craft store. Choose yarn, needles, and a basic book, and put it all in a pretty knitting basket, and you’ve started your man down the path to an enjoyable hobby. i started at the insistence of Nancy and Sue as a way to occupy my free time and to possibly participate in Sue’s knitting circle – yes, i am in Her circle and look forward to serving and knitting with a house full of Her friends. i love to knit and it’s a nice departure from patriarchy.

Stationery – Matching paper and notecards are always welcome as the domesticated man has numerous opportunities to send off a note; not only for what he writes but for the impression he makes. i make use of fine stationery as i routinely write the Women of the family to both keep in touch and to worship them from afar. Stationery is readily available locally in card shops or online. It can be customized with the recipient’s name if desired. Styles range from plain to elaborate, and the man seeking to distance himself from patriarchy will love pastels or florals.

Potpourri – Potpourri is a mixture dried flowers, spices, and leaves used to freshen a room. A jar of potpourri will be appreciated by the homemaker for the extra touch it adds to a just cleaned room.

Sachet – Like potpourri a sachet contains dried flowers and spices but in a small bag that can be placed in a drawer with clothes, towels, or sheets or hung in a closet to give a fresh scent.

Lessons – Give the gift of learning by signing him up for lessons in knitting, needlepoint, ikebana, cooking, or whatever his Wife might want him to learn. Courses aren’t expensive and can provide a lifetime of enjoyment.

Jewelry – Increasingly progressive gentlemen wear jewelry, so a nice ring, earrings, or a bracelet are certainly to be considered. Check with his Wife and buy based on Her preferences and guidance. i love wearing the rings and earrings Sue has given me over the years, particularly the ones that were once Her Mother’s.

Final points on gift-giving:

§  Check the appropriateness of any gift by having your Wife contact his Wife and follow the guidance received. i wouldn’t dare buy my friend tom a gift without getting Linda’s full approval; similarly i know that what i receive from tom will have met Nancy’s approval.

§  Buy within your budget; have your Wife advise you and do as She says.

§  Buy him things that are conducive to his role as homemaker.

§  Shop with your Wife so She can critique your selections and approve or disapprove.

–d