In
earlier posts i have noted various holidays that are wonderful opportunities
for men to buy gifts for the Women in their lives. Birthdays, Valentine’s Day,
Mother-in-Law’s Birthday and so on, all merit carefully selected, quality
gifts. But in terms of what Women really want there are far more important days
coming up that the modern man must celebrate. These special days provide us males
an opportunity to reflect on Women’s issues and Feminism, to make efforts to
accelerate the progress of Women, and to hasten the downfall of patriarchy. Our
congregation and Women’s Center observe the following as times for reflection,
commitment, and action:
Feminist
Susan B. Anthony Birthday – February 15
March
– Women’s History Month
International
Women’s Day – March 9
Women’s
Equality Day – August 26
Feminist
Elizabeth Cady Stanton Birthday – November 12
There
are a great many activities that take place around these events in which men
can – and should! - participate:
§
Participate
in rallies and marches aimed at highlighting the inequities in Women’s pay,
career opportunities, and so on. Real men will be active participants and very
visible at such events.
§
Listen
to and learn from lectures and readings on Feminist topics
§
Attend
a Women’s art exhibit
§
Do
a reading at a Feminist event
§
Write
a letter to the editor of a local paper supporting a Feminist issue or position
§
Learn
a craft or domestic skill by taking a class or workshop; it’s a wonderful
opportunity for men to cross gender lines – not to worry, Women welcome us on
their side of the line but a word of warning – once you cross you may find it
hard to go back!
§
Commit
to read six Feminist books over the next year; discuss them with Women,
including how each book has changed your perspectives. In my case Nancy and Her
Mother routinely assign me “required reading” on a variety of topics ranging
from Feminist literature to romance novels. I have to discuss the readings,
articulate the Women’s positions in each of the readings, and cite how the
reading changed my perspective.
§
In
celebration of the aforementioned days send cards with a personal note and
perhaps a small gift to Women-friends. Use cursive writing and Sue demands my
using decidedly Feminine matching stationery. The latter shows my willingness
to adopt something from Women’s side of the gender line and it conveys my
belief that Women, their views, and tastes are mainstream.
§
Support
and work for Female Candidates for public office; we need more
Female
perspective in public life. Get involved in a campaign! Helping Women get
elected has been a personal commitment. It’s rewarding to see more and more
Women in public office.
§
Listen
to a Women’s discussion group or lecture on Feminist issues, wage inequity, for
example. As Nancy says, men should “Shut up and listen” - we men can learn a
lot by listening to Women. Take what you heard into discussions with male
friends and advocate the Women’s point of view.
§
Take
a Women’s Studies class for some formal immersion in Feminism – men will learn
a lot!
§
Perform
service at a Women’s Center; the progressive gentlemen in our social circle do
this weekly; sign up to volunteer to do whatever is needed and make a real
contribution.
§
Donate
time and money – Men make more than Women and should be happy to give their
patriarchy-derived surplus to Women and to Women’s causes. Nancy has determined
that men earn at least 25% more than Women so, to level the playing field, She
demands that 25% of my earnings be given over to Women (She and Sue are a great
place to start!) and Women’s issues.
Our
Women’s Center collects and distributes money throughout the year for the
benefit of Women and Women’s activities. Men are expected to generously donate
and are charged fees for participating in the Centers activities or just to
volunteer. Monies are anonymously distributed to Women for a variety of
purposes. Men often commit to giving over the course of a year; for example,
two men are paying for a Woman’s cell phone and data plan for a year. Two other
men have committed to donate $2,400 – a mere $100 per month each – to a Women’s
studies program at a local college. Where’s their $100 a month coming from –
well, they’ve given up trips to the local bar and will instead work at the
Center one evening a week.
Housekeeping
– men at the Center volunteer to regularly do housework, repair work, etc., for
Women who want their help. The men’s work is done under the strict supervision
of the Center’s staff. Men taking the Housekeeping 101 do a practicum of
housework for Women that spans many weeks. Even after they have completed
Housekeeping 101, men continue to do the practicums as a personal commitment to
think globally but act locally.
Get
involved with Women’s issues and initiatives at work. Mentor and support Women.
Support Women for promotions even though doing so may limit your opportunities.
After all, you’re likely not as well qualified as Women now in the workforce;
they are coming into the workplace in greater numbers and bringing impeccable
credentials. They’re going to run things sooner than later so get used to it
and get on board!
In
many companies vacation time is determined by seniority; unfortunately, men
have most seniority and so more vacation. To right this inequity, a few of us
have given back vacation days to be placed in a “vacation bank” from which
extra days will be awarded to Female staff.
§
Accept
and support Women in leadership positions at work; defer to them; accept your
subordinate position.
§
Encourage
Women to adopt a leadership posture by deferring to them – at work – at home –
wherever!
§
Recognize
that Women-only activities at work – seminars, classes, trips, mentoring, etc –
aren’t discriminatio’! Rather, these are necessary to allow Women to
participate on a level playing field.
§
Make
treating Women – ALL WOMEN! – with courtesy and respect a habit - “Yes, Ma’am!”
§
Recognize
the innate superiority of Women and the inequities and exploitation that
patriarchy promotes.
Why
is all this important? Well, despite their moral, intellectual, and emotional
superiority, Women are underrepresented in leadership positions and still undercompensated.
Gender equality will make society better!
--d
Hi
Mark,
When
Geoff started investigating FLRs, I was at first skeptical, but willing to give
it a try. Well, let’s just say that I won't be going back to the old way!
I
have read a book by Elise Sutton [Female
Domination] and, while some of it is informative, I couldn't treat my slave
hubby with the disrespect some do. After all, a happy slave is a productive
slave. While I love having my feet and legs massaged, I would never expect him
to lick my boots. That would be treating him disrespectfully.
As
his reward for good service he gets and gives great loving. That part of our
relationship is wonderful now because I don't feel tired all the time.
